Bringing Baby Home During a Pandemic

Bringing a new baby into the world is both wonderful and stressful in the best of times. The first weeks and months at home are a period of adjustment, even if you’re an experienced mother. Now, the upheaval and strain caused by the coronavirus pandemic is making this period even more challenging for new mothers.

There are ways, though, that you can find some relief and support, even while maintaining social distancing or while under a shelter-in-place or lockdown order.

Take comfort in nature

First, it can help to remember that nature shows us that we are part of a greater whole. There is joy in new beginnings, as well as a gentle reminder that life will go on. Other species go to great lengths to shelter and protect their fragile newborns. The mother polar bear gives birth in a den dug deep into a snowbank, only emerging with her cubs when they are strong enough to move on their own. Giant anteaters have only one baby per year, and mothers carry their babies wherever they go. Long-tailed macaque monkeys, which live in highly complex social groups, are particularly nurturing; in fact, females are not considered fully fledged adults until they have given birth to an infant.

Remembering that you are part of the great circle of life can be a comfort during this fragile time, whether you are experiencing it during a pandemic or not.

Protecting your infant

In general, even in more normal times, pediatricians and other doctors encourage new mothers to keep infants away from crowds and sick people for the first few weeks and months. This is to protect your newborn baby’s fragile developing immune system. So, in some ways, many parents experience an individual shelter-in-place period during this time.

Taking care of yourself

Even though time seems scarce, you must care for yourself during this period. Self-care is not a luxury; it’s essential. A good self-care regimen helps you meet your physical, emotional, and social needs and gives you more resilience in taking care of your baby. Self-care entails making sure that you rest as much as possible (difficult with even the easiest newborn), eat nutritious food, exercise, connect with people, and do things that you love.

During the pandemic, many new mothers are going through adjustment to their newborns without the help of their own mothers. This can be especially difficult. Stay connected in any way you can, whether through video calls, “window visits,” or “driveway visits” if possible.

The baby blues and post-partum depression

The first weeks and months post-birth is when baby blues or post-partum depression can hit hard. New mothers’ hormones ride serious ups and downs, so it is wise to know what to expect, and when to seek help. With the baby blues, it is normal to experience mood swings, crying spells, and some difficulty sleeping, especially one to three weeks after your baby is born. Post-partum depression is far more serious and can hit months after your baby is born. If you’re struggling with irritability or anger, difficulty bonding with your baby, feelings of helplessness, overwhelming fatigue or more, it may be time to seek help and support. A good place to start is with your doctor or your baby’s pediatrician. In fact, many pediatricians incorporate a screening for post-partum depression in one or two of the visits in the months following your baby’s birth.

What you can do

Amid all these restrictions, and knowing that caring for a newborn can be very challenging, what can you do? First, remember that time in nature can soothe both of you, especially if you can respect social distancing guidelines and keep your infant (and yourself) safe.

• Go outside, even if just for a few minutes. Exposure to sunlight can boost mood.
• If you can’t go outside, find a sunny spot near a window to sit in with your baby. The warmth and light can lift your mood.
• A walk, even if short, can help you stimulate your baby’s five senses, as well as your own. Of course, respect social distancing guidelines, like maintaining proper distance or avoiding crowded trails and paths.
• Rest when the baby sleeps. If you find it difficult to fall fully asleep, know that even laying down and closing your eyes can help you feel refreshed.
• Let your partner take over. Going for a walk by yourself can feel good. Many lactation consultants consider it safe to introduce a bottle when your newborn is three weeks old. If you’re pumping, your partner can feed the baby, giving you more flexibility.
• Reach out to other mothers—your own, friends, aunts or others—who have been through this situation. It can be very powerful to have a friend who is also nurturing a newborn at this time and who can be a safe person to talk to.

It can be easy to lose sight of the fact that this time is short. Your newborn will become an infant, a toddler, and a preschooler. The pandemic will end. Now is the time to give yourself grace and acceptance. Many have gone before you. Many will come after.

Hold your baby close. Know that it is my wish that you enjoy this period of nurture and adjustment.

Be well and stay safe.